A little more real.

After receiving a bunch of messages, the general consensus seems to be that yes, I do sound like an asshole, but I should still continue the blog. So yes I will continue, but I'm changing things a bit. Basically when I would sit down to update, I would think of the most interesting, funny, ridiculous shit that happened to me over the past few days and write it out for the reader's amusement. No more.

I'm no longer going to pull the ridiculousness out of my experience. I think that's when I stopped enjoying this, when it started to feel like I was writing for an audience. There have been a ton of amazing lessons that I've learned or experiences that I've had that I didn't write about because I didn't feel that they were entertaining enough. From now on I'm keeping this for me. This blog is my journal, no longer a stage that I feel like I need to perform on. So what you'll get now, is a bit more realistic, more honest, more personal account of this experience in Argentina. Don't worry. There will still be crazy stories, I'm sure.

That being said, here is something that I have been meaning to do, introduce you to my friends. I'm tight with all the exchange students here but here are the key players:

Meet Leah. Leah is all my favorite girls in one. If you combined Brittany and Emily, added a teaspoon of Molly for flavor, and gave her Amy's drinking ability and laugh, you'd have Leah. She's pretty much my partner in crime for everything I do here.



Meet Ann. Ann is my Charlotte. Very zen. Very granola. Completely laid back. Chiller than chill, she's ice cold. Great sense of humor and an excellent conversationalist. Ann plans on marrying a futbol (soccer) star and teaching English in South America.



Meet Brian. Music student. Enough said.



Meet Amy. Amy is super upbeat, energetic, a Harry Potter fanatic, and the most hilarious drunk you will ever meet. During our first interaction she declared that I was "magical" and we've been tight ever since.



I'll probably introduce you to more people later.

The first week of classes has been alright. I'm studying like crazy. For my modern history class I'll read an entire chapter and underline every word that I don't understand in Spanish. Then I'll go look up every single word. This takes forever because usually there's about 90 of them. Then I go through and read the whole chapter again, but this time after I finish each paragraph I jot down all the important concepts and facts in my notebook. This way I am completely sure I understand everything that is going on. Does it take forever? Yes. Is it worth it? Definitely. Why? Because if I ace my classes I don't have to take finals. So? If I don't have to take finals I have an extra week to travel around South America.

A dirgession: I have this little problem. It's called wanderlust. I think about traveling more often than the average male thinks about sex. If I'm not in class chances are I have a map, two guidebooks, and my laptop in front of me and I am researching where I want to go next. It's even started getting in the way of my school work a little. I'll be studying and then I think to myself, 'I wonder how many kilometers Machu Picchu is from Santiago.' And I'll go look it up. I spend hours everyday studying geography and culture and making mental lists of cities I need to visit and things I need to do before I go home. Here's the deal, after November 23rd I'm homeless. But my return flight to the states isn't until mid December. So I'm going to be bumming around Latin America for a good two to three weeks with only what I can carry on my back. I. CAN'T. WAIT. After all my research I've decided that I am going to spend the last of my time on this continent in southern Argentina, Chile, and Peru.

Back to the school thing: My film production class is my hardest one. Right now I already know everything that they are learning, except I don't know it in Spanish. For example, the first day of class we were given a quiz during which we had to define color temperature. I remember the Spanish vocab unit about "food" and "clothes" and of course the classic "rooms of the house." Obviously we never had a unit on "film production equipment and concepts." Therefore I am entirely unable to communicate in this course. But I'm learning. Our first assignment is to adapt Edgar Allan Poe's, "The Tell Tale Heart" into a short film.

Ladies and gentlemen, I am about to do something very taboo. I'm going to talk about my weight. First of all this should not be such a difficult topic for a girl to talk about. But it is, because no matter what you say you come off looking like a bitch. If you say think you're fat, you either sound depressed and overly self-conscious like you're about to become bulimic, or you sound like you're fishing for compliments. If you say you're skinny, you sound completely full of yourself. Fuck it. I'm talking about it.

So I've gained some weight in college. Most of us have, it's not a big deal. I was never really that concerned about it. I mean sure, I could afford to loose a few pounds, tone up, lose that little belly that I've gotten thanks to our buffet style dining halls and my serious lack of self control when it comes to food. But for some reason I just never really cared enough to completely change my habits. Why am I going into all this? Well all of a sudden I kinda care about my weight. OK I really care about my weight. What made me totally self-conscious? I am the fat girl in my classes. The fatest, if you will. Yes, I am using a superlative. The most fat. All the girls here are just straight up and down twigs. No curves in this country. Just skin and bone.

Argentina has huge problems with bulimia and anorexia. A few years ago the Argentine government actually passed a law saying that clothing stores had to carry larger sizes because their refusal to do so was fueling this national psyche that women have to be super thin. In a few of these posts I've mentioned that I didn't bring that much clothing with me because I thought that I would be able to buy a few things when I got here. Not so. The real reason I haven't been able to is because I have yet to find a store that sells anything in my size.

So I'm going to lose weight. Don't worry, I'm not going to be sticking my fingers down my throat, or starving myself, or going on some crazy crash diet where I only drink juice for a month. I'm going about this the healthy way. Good food and exercise. Eating healthy was never a value that my parents instilled in me. When I was in grade school I could seriously eat a bag of Oreos and all the french fries I wanted and not gain an ounce. So I did. Freshman year of high school I was 90 pounds. The problem is when you become an adult your metabolism slows down, but my eating habits didn't change. So I'm finally learning to eat healthy, it's long overdue. I need to stop thinking of food as entertainment. I'll actually think to myself, "I'm bored. I'm gunna go make something to eat." You should eat because it's fuel for your body, not because you have nothing better to do. I should be thinking to myself, "I'm bored. I'm gunna go read a book." I'm cutting way back on the drinking and smoking, eating healthy meals, drinking water, and going to the gym everyday. Done.

Speaking of physical change, to ink or not to ink: I've been thinking about getting a tattoo. Something little. I have two ideas right now but I'm not ready to get them just yet. Tattoos are just so...permanent. I mean, that's something that you are going to take with you to your gave. If you are planning on walking around for the rest of your life with something inked on your body, it better mean a lot to you. I decided the only way I should get a tatoo is if I wait a year or two after I first think of the idea. If it still sounds appealing then it might be worth it.

Pay it forward: The most frustrating thing about learning a new language is that when I talk to local people and they hear the imperfections in my speech they immediately assume that I am stupid and they get frustrated or irritated. The next time you interact with someone that doesn't speak perfect English, no matter how difficult it is to understand them, please please please smile, be patient, and really try to communicate with them. They'll appreciate it more than you could imagine.

Tomorrow I am heading off to Brazil. I'm hoping to sneak across the boarder without having to pay the $100USD entrance fee that they charge American citizens. From all the research I've done it seems like the boarder patrol at Foz de Iguazu is pretty relaxed about tourists crossing over. So Ann and I are hopping on a bus tomorrow night and we'll see if we can make it happen. Wish me luck.

An afterthought: I know that I write in incomplete sentences, and that I change verb tense a lot. And, that, sometimes, I tend to overuse punctuation. For some reason I picture Amy Weiss reading this blog and questioning my use of the semicolon or comma. I know it's wrong, that's just how I write. Love you Amy.